belonging — EMPOWERED TIMES BLOG

Self-Forgiveness for Emotional Regeneration

The human body is a marvel at releasing and renewing. Our bodies know how to let go of what has served its purpose through cellular regeneration. Though our body intuitively clears and heals, our minds often cling to regret, shame, and self-blame—setting up defenses that keep us stuck in emotional “scar tissue”.

Learning how to recognize when we are stuck in self-defeating cycles is integral to our mental health. Many people fear that forgiving themselves will let them “off the hook” too easily. Sometimes our need for forgiveness stems from a behavior or action within our control. Other times, we may subconsciously blame ourselves for something that was outside of our power like accidents, being abused or assaulted, or circumstances we never chose.

Self-forgiveness isn’t as simple as being excused or absolved. It’s not about denying or justifying harmful actions. It is a process of being honest with oneself, accepting responsibility, and cultivating self-compassion. This requires a level of vulnerability that we can’t force or hack our way through.

Like our body’s constant cellular regeneration, self-forgiveness is a powerful healing process. Emotional regeneration allows us to shed old stories, release what no longer serves us, and make space for new beginnings. The following steps serve as guideposts in your self-forgiveness journey…

The Key to Successful Relationships: Improvise!

Great relationships, like great music, thrive when we embrace improvisation.

The most common complaints I hear in relationship therapy are: you don't understand me, you don't see me, or you don't appreciate me.

Ultimately, we all want to matter in our relationships, whether it's feeling seen by a romantic partner, being acknowledged by a professional peer or supervisor, or feeling appreciated by a member of our family.

When we don’t feel seen or heard, we end up feeling alone in our relationships. At best this can be isolating. At worst it can feel threatening and unsafe. We’re more inclined to respond defensively. We withdraw, seek out distractions, or attempt to fill the void with other sources (ie vices).

When we show up with interest and curiosity, we’re more engaged and open to the unfolding dynamic between us. It’s a reciprocal dance that requires us to intentionally slow down and pay attention.

Sawubona is a beautiful expression in Zulu which means, "I see you.” It's a reverent acknowledgment, an honoring… a way of meeting you as you are. As we feel seen in our relationships, we experience a sense of safety within ourselves and in the relationship, which allows us to show up more authentically and confidently.

Inspiring Imperfection in a Season of Comparison

We may imagine summer as a season of ease and freedom—barefoot in the grass, sun on your skin, wind in your hair— but for many of us, it’s also a time that evokes contradiction and comparison. We peel away layers of clothing, only to scrutinize the bodies beneath. Beach holidays and pool parties entice us to be carefree and savor the moment, but we often find ourselves stuck in an old script—measuring our bodies against others, or against our own from summers past.

The goalposts of beauty are always shifting. We internalize the cultural messages and adapt to the fickle social trends. We strive to conform, yet long to feel seen. We pursue perfection, meanwhile we aspire to be authentic. Perfection pushes us into a binary and absolute way of existing: all or nothing, good or bad, right or wrong. Though rooted in the desire to be whole or complete, unrelenting perfectionism often disconnects us from our true selves.

Just as investing in external relationships creates safety and trust, investing in the relationship with ourselves deepens our connection to who we are—not how we look. When we embrace imperfection, we cultivate a more free and authentic relationship with ourselves. Here are 7 Ways to love the skin you’re in this summer.

The Search for Belonging (Hint: Look Inside!)

Everyone craves a sense of belonging. To feel accepted and connected to others is a core human need. We tend to migrate toward those who have shared values and perspectives. This does not automatically assume that it comes from our family of origin. It’s become quite common for people to opt for a “Friendsgiving” instead of the traditional Thanksgiving, because the environment they were raised in feels neither safe nor supportive.

Belonging can be precarious when it depends on how well we comply and conform to accommodate the standards or expectations of others. Sustainable belonging delves beneath the surface and gives us the permission to show up exactly as we are, including our mistakes, failures, and flaws. Creating a culture within and around us where we can share both positive and negative experiences without fear of judgment or rejection allows us to feel more authentic and free to be ourselves.

Read more to discover 5 ways to cultivate belonging from within.

Bringing Ancient Wisdom into Our Future

Ancient Greek thinkers and philosophers explored the quantitative versus qualitative juxtaposition of the human experience. They had two distinct words to describe time—chronos (clocks & calendars) and kairos (an immeasurable moment). They coined the term hedonia to refer to worldly pleasures, and eudaemonia to describe an internal connection to our sense of purpose.

We are entering a new chapter in history in which the study of ancient practices and expansive states of mind are not only respectable subjects, but are also associated with health and vitality. Concepts such as meditation and breathwork have become more commonplace in the corporate world. Psychedelic-assisted therapies and plant-based medicines have gained traction among reputable medical and research institutions. These modern trends, rooted in ancient tradition, focus on the benefits of expanded states of consciousness which invoke a sense of freedom and possibility.

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